AlaskaVillageTales

One villageKid!! screamed at theOther!!, "Your VPSO's so fat, that theNonProfit gave him a Cement truck for a patrol vehicle!!" Oh yeah!?, Well, Your VPSO's so fat, your Mom thinks she has 3 boyfriends!! ------------------------------- Sorry, I'm bad at jokes, but who could tell!? ------------------------------- One VPSO screamed at theOtherOfficer!! "Your VillageChick!!'s so fat, it took you 5 hours just to read theMirandaRights!! to ALL of her!!" Oh yeah!? Well your VillageChick!!'s so fat, she's not only her ownVillage!!, she's her own Region!! ------------------------------- Your VPSO's so fat, that when no VillageChixxx!! are around, he flattens his Patrol vehicle tires just to get blown!! Sorry!! ------------------------------ Your VPSO's so fat, he farts and theSeismicDetectors in SouthAmerica go on high alert!! Oh yeah!? Well your VPSO's so fat, when he went swimming in theRiver!!, 18 Villages downRiver were flooded

Last year this Blogger never had this feature, I had to go load up my pics on 2 or 3 other photo host servers, What you should see is Two fruit, an Angry orange yelling at what looks like a small smiling peach, I'm thePeach!! cos I really don't like being mean at all and I can take other people's mean-ness too cos I know that whomever is having a bad day is facing pressure from THEIR superiors or else is Grandstanding, being a bully and mean people really don't control me. Anyway, I hope the photo from my pc to Blogger works. luvs, theSam!! anchorage, alaska

"As a Village!! blogger, You want to follow theTrends!! see, every now and then, or as I do, every then and later, I like to peruse theState!!'s website and analyze theArrestReports in terms of Report Structure and various considerations. Every LEO I know says to write your reports in Chronological form!! Like I didn't know that already!!, but anywayz, as I pursue theState!!'s website to read and to laugh and cry and gather up inspiration for theNext!! DVE in myVillage!!, I can't help but wonder if all theTop40 Reports read like an Top40 songList on theRadio, Just think about it, When you analyze songs and discover that most songs have an short Introduction, an 1stVerse, an Bridge, an Chorus, then 2ndVerse and Chorus, then Bridge to Finishing with theChorus again. You have to look at things like that, written Reports which will "grab" theReader!!, in much the same fashion as an "boyfriend" grabs his "girlfriend" in an strangle hold, O

wow, another example of coherent lyric interpreting. where was YouTube when I first discovered Rush, JudasPriest and LitaFord back in the 1980's!? -------------------- Misheard Lyrics, GraveDigger, via YouTube!! d:oP ------------- -I don't eat off the Plate, her kiss to be consensual for a clogged sink, So I saw her, sword in stove, Release!!, will bring the stove, uuahhh.. Frozen chosen, What!? The almighty will break out, the only one left is the crowd!! It's calling Burt!! Swan of the keys, Take me on your wigs, back where I belong it's calling Burt!! -Every sink bound to fail, Noble hat bound to gain all, cherries you fear!! Saucer on Charlie's stove, Raisin!! With senseless gnomes, cheese that growl. theAlmighty now throws the dykes, wrestles a man, he's out of Ice!! It's calling Burt!!, Swan of thekeys, Tape me on your wigs, back where I belong, It's calling Burt!! -Brace your soap, Wash yourself!! he deserves frozen Eggo, Leaf retainer!! Its scary

theSam!! found her!! his next female Idol, her name's Angela and she's from Sweden. Hmmm, I wonder if I'll have to move there to find her though?! But seriously, Arch Enemy rocks!! and I found these funny you tube postings of "Misheard Lyrics", so, if I don't post here for a few weeks more, you'll know that I'm relistening to all theSlayer vids, CelticFrost, to GraveDigger and yes, listening to my favorite piano babe "Amy" of Evanescence to see just the heck it is she's "Really" saying!! hhmmmm. I wonder which of these Metal bands will take up theVillage!! cause and interpret my blog Postings!? luvs, theSam!! slflyinghorse theVillage!!, I'llAskYa

this message is brought to you by hot VillageChick!! mzMary Lynn Merlot!! this VillageChick!! was aged for more than the prerequisite 17months as typical villageGirls!! are. And when she thrusts herself upon you, Into your Life, into your house. Heck!! Into theParty!! she "Barrels" on in there with her huge bosoms leading theWay!! MzMerlot is an expression in Village!! berry wildness, so much so that she even comes complete with her own warning label about staying out of the way after she drinks AND operates heavy machinery and motor vehicles!! And lately, theVillageCouncil!! crew of locally appointed work men have pretty much kept mzMerlow's drinking schedule in mind when they need work done, they get lots of help from her for free!! albeit , most of it at 0200hrs, 0300hrs, 0600hrs but hey, labor's labor whether it's squeezing a new Villager!! out theWomb!! every 11 to 12 months or operating an handPacker in a trench after busting up theWaterLines from backH

theSam!! has been looking at various “song writing” guides and subjects here and there on theNet. Thought I’d share some more memorable materials for creating Lyrics. Telling story in PastTense: Write about a situation that you were in, or perhaps your friends, family you were in. It could even be completely made up and totally fictional!! like an certain Blog!! I heard about?! alaskaVillageTales!! Some ideas: -Write about your first crush. She was 185 when she sat on me, she broke my heart and bruised my spleen!! Now she’s no longer 17 and on Yootube they craned her from her house, I used to feed her twinkies throw them in her mouth!! -When your grandfather died. he was theLife of theParty, and everyone got drunk, and like PatsyKline he now falls to pieces, I’m sure glad we don’t Fly and hit theTreeses -When your best friend stabbed you in the back. by stealing my Sister!! or my Mom...... or Dad, or my other dog. How could you betray me you damn mutt!? -When the girl you fancied

But seriously, ENUF!! about my hot girlfriends in Bikinis way out in theVillage!! We'll get to that later.... More Village!! news. Village base fends off string of Drive-a-Van attacks!! *sigh* “those Cute little old ladies and “innocent” kids are importing I tell ya!!, but I just can’t quite put my finger on it and prove how!!”, fumed theSafety!! “and why oh why is it always , After the 3 days of Witness phone calls theOnly vehicle that ever shows up at theCorrect time that everyone swears to, is the same tan colored Mini Van!?” ------------------------------------ “pack it” Stan still unclear if his weapons are safe and secure, After all, where else?! but theVillage can you attempt to shoot your relatives, chase them around the Yard with your rifle and after getting arrested, charged and serve time, still expect to return home and see your stack of rifles inside theArctic entry way-to include theRifle you shot at everyone with!? Where else?! No place else but theVillage!! -------

yet not quite as Pale as an Alaskan Native or ME!! for that matter..... anyways. theBladder & theUreters present More Village!! CountryGold from theSam!! or at least an light amber pale ale Color!! More Village CountryGold!! I saw her sittin‘ on my front porch holding jello; I can still recall that potato salad I once wore; She was drinkin’ brake fluid when she kissed me, and I stopped on a dime ever after, and nothing more; Her parents knew I’d hate her dog forever; She said to me, theStove’s broke, the meat won’t fry; But who’d have thought she’d make dinner 3in theMorning; I pushed her Mutt off the bridge and waved goodbye. ------------------------ I met her on the highway when I was walking; she’d thrown me out theCar a few miles back; then Out!! went Dad, Gram, Mom & her Sister; We waved at her in theDitch when we walked by; She’s got 2 flat wheels, and I’ve a flat butt; Her sister’s got all theBrains-In HER Shirt; Mom’s got 2 front teeth and Dad lost his Glasses; And

for free, yes Absolutely free Village lessons, just log onto AlaskaVillageTales and learn for yourself!! theVillage!! *singing* "we ARE theVillage!! world, look at ourChildren. they are theOnes who see theLight of day, while were passed out from Imbibing. While theCouncil's shaken, VPSO's are saving lives!!" oh.. Sorry Michael, Didn't mean to ruin your Song. theVillage!! for all yoo sphiisticateed llluushes Out thar!! *Hic-cup!!* theVillage!! running to talk about Village-ism!!, but mostly running from theVPSO!! theVillage!! ourVPSO's flashlight's, among other things, make us throwUp!! We'll start with his Reports and then move onto that crummy Violin practice!! theVillage!! back to SquareOne!!, that small 10'x10' HoldingCell. theVillage!! thousands of "Idle" wannabes turn up Statewide!! theVillage!! Always, low low LOW expectations!! (and standards, neckLines, waistLines) theVillage!! see Alaska deEvolve right before your very eyes!

Thursday, 02 August, 2007 Accusation: Who Dared theVillage!! to Luv Sam!!? Subject: Licensed Unrestricted VendorsOf theSam!! YVC Inc (doh!!) dba YourVillageCalled!! / YukonVillageConsortium is pleased to announced another JointVenture (everyone Inhale!!) to theFranchise that is otherwise known as “theVillage” Licensed Unrestricted Vendors, theSam!! Last fall, YVCInc / AVA, M/FANG and no less than 3 Regional Village groups; Behemoth Bosoms!!, saggyHooters, and smearedLipstick!! announced the release of requests for proposals (RFPs) for Statewide organizations to bid to serve as licensed unrestricted vendors, (Luvs theSam!!) It was decided to do this in leau of announcing theRelease of 4 VPSO Prisoners and 3 more “In Custodies at this Time” from 5 VPSO’s in theRegion, respectively. Many submissions, remissions, even an few nocturnalEmissions!! were well received in response to the RFPs. Except for theNoctE’s!! as those are always welcome, but unexpected and often inconvenient if n