2009 Things to do with theSam!!

2009 Things To Do With ArmySam!!

 

01  d:oP

Lick iceCream!! and why not?!, thePrivate has had plenty of practice at theDFAC / diningFacilities (chowHall) sneaking those iceCream sandwiches when theDrill Sergeants / DS aren't looking.

 

Keep running every day Sam!!, keep losing weight and being able to move faster so you can sneak MORE iceCream ya' fatAss!!

 

02  Hike theWorld Famous "StairWay To Heaven"

After spending a nice relaxing week camping in theWoods around ft Benning, you can strap 70lbs of gear on your back, grab your rifle and head on down the road with your hiking buddies eager to find this stairway of legend.

 

Careful though that you walk theStairWay on UnSprained ankles and that you didn't injure your hams or knees weeks previous either, else you might fall back from theGroup while roadMarching and completely miss out on this GraduationRequirement walk

 

Don't worry though, if you have to drop out from anklePain, you'll just hike around the gravel PT track next to theBarracks 48 times (which equals 12 miles) to get your CrossedRifles pin tacked upon your chest by your leadDrillSgt,

 

yeah, you'll bleed alot too from thePin posts being smashed into your flesh, so much that you'll think you're dying and... hey!! You're on your way to Heaven!!

 

03  Take a FlightSeeing Trip!!

you'll only do this historic memorable trip twice though, On your way to BootCamp and on your way HOME from BootCamp via deltaScareLines (or often DeltaLongLines!!)

 

If you're lucky, you'll cross paths (literally) with your LOST luggage from your trip TO bootCamp, however if you're UNLUCKY, you'll literally cross paths with your LOST luggage or at least some Clothes of yours being worn by an airlineEmploy, Police or Security while on your trip Home!!

 

When that happens, stop being mad and enjoy the complimentary MileHighMojito's fed to you from theMILF stewardess' and finish off your Tylenol pills, you do remember the PAIN you're in from spraining your ankles a week before going out on Field Training Exercises / FTX don't ya'?!

 

04  Go Camping!!

and we do mean "go camping - anywhere"

 

anywhere theDS / drillSgts tell you. In fact, dig a hole anywhere they tell you, dig it deep and wide and even foolishly fall IN to that hole as well. 

 

Dig dig dig, but first go camping cos you can't end up digging...... without first - going camping!!

oh.... and make sure your RuckSack weighs 70lbs, that you have your rifle and that you fell off theObstacleCourse BEFORE you go camping!!

 

05  Scream At theTop Of Your Lungs!!

yell out stuff like,  "the Army Song", "theInfantryman'sCreed" and my personal fave "the answer to Just what the hell is it that I'm even doing back in military uniform at my advanced age?!"

 

Be sure to end or begin your answers with "DrillSergeant!!"

 

06  Cavort shirtless in a light Georgia rain!!

or at least try and look at it that way, from that perspective when your platoon buddies screw up and make everyone else do 30mins of PT punishment and then 70 sweaty, exhausted men have 10mins to freshen up a bit in theLatrine showers before donning their serviceDressGreen tops and heading on over to have their individual graduation pictures taken.

 

yeah, that's it, try to look at your 5 second shower as just that, a light Georgia rain to cavort through as you Careen through theBay area on crutches.   

 

07  Stop and Smell theRoses!!

literally.

just stop sometime during your hundred meter lowCrawl across the 500meter wide field and take a breather.

 

It's not your fault that some people around you aren't looking hard enough for trash, spent ammo brass hidden in the ankle high field grass and theDS make everyone crawl on elbows & knees back and forth across the field to get a better perspective on things.

 

just stop!!, but don't suck up any ants, mosquitos or bugs up your nose when smelling those roses.

 

d:oP

 

lovs, privateSam!!