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Showing posts from July, 2007

theVillageChixxx!! Are Just Happier

This Post was sat On by an Cute VillageChick!! albeit an cute Hot Fat one!!

She's having fun topping out thePosts here at AK VillageTales at 160!!
theVillageChick!! is fat coz she's Pregnant!! d:oP

Shamelessly plagiarized from "theMen Are Just Happier" joke. One among many spams that I get in my Email box from all over thePlace!!

Reasons Why VillageChixxx!! Are Just Happier!!

-People-- What do you expect ...WE ARE such simple creatures.
Just give us the$, theBooze, theCigs and theTV remote, the iPod!!, let us Be on theInternet and no one gets hurt!!

-Your last name stays put.
Completely Kaput!! like some SafetyOfficer careers in theVillage!!

But seriously, Your last name stays put on Every arrest and investigation report for Decades to come.

In fact so much, that your Granma's Great grandKids have never ever forgiven your Granma's Great Great Grandparents for ever ever Once helping out THEIR VPSO!!

-The garage is all yours.
What Garage!?

This is theVillage!! and OUR …

July 2007 ADN Opinion

Tough job in the Bush
Help wanted: village police


It’s hard to be a cop in a small town, especially one you grew up in, said Alvin Brown, with son Wallace, 4, and daughter Alexis, 10, mid-June in Mountain Village. Brown, currently the Village Public Safety Officer, has worked in law enforcement 18 years. ( ERIK HILL / Anchorage Daily News)
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(Begin theSam!! says: after 10, almost 11 months of OJT in theVillage!! theJan 2002 VPSO Class 29 start date came round and I went to Sitka for 2 months.

It was at this time that I met VPSO Alvin Brown, as he was in my class. He was a big guy back then, which is part of the reason why he was sent back home. He graduated theVPSO program at a later date. He's smaller now in thePhoto and his children are indeed happy to have such an good man to protect and provide for them.

But none of this VPSO class reTake set back, takes away from what he was and still is, one of those Outstanding Officers that espouse what qualities are…

Take Her Back!!

this Post is aponsored by:
theIraqi authorities whom have consulted theOfficers!! in theVillage!! for advice upon imposing vehicle bans.


-"Just park theVehicles and release them at $100 to theTitledOwner!!" said one VPSO. an CURRENT state drivers licensed owner to be exact.

Another Officer up theRiver agrees....
-"Mmpnnthhpp, thhpaphhmmppehhhthmm..."

*Sips boxed milk*

"andn;mjthth hemmmttpphhmm... andnd ;lhhhh amumrhtphhtpp..."

*an VillageChick!! spoon feeds more Tator salad into theMaw!!

"so afterh den days all thyorhapmmmthhtm..mmmptththphph!!" theChew!! continues.

theVillageChick!! next to him with a covered plate of spaghetti,
her mood turning sour upon Reflection glances over at theImpoundedCars!!

and seeing her Chevy Pickup STILL sitting after 3 months,
Smacks thePlate!! over theOfficers head and storms away.

"mmph umppth... Anymore bread!!??" herMan follows her expectantly.

However, theFrench!! whom were warning of Violence to Lesbians i…

Who Wants to be an Villageaire!!

Who Wants To Be an Village-aire!!
From thePages of Sam!!, Read some text regarding excellent Villaged!! customer service and then Pick (1) / One / Unos of the four Options at the end,

In other words,
What would you do?!

Sam On!!
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Who Wants to Be an Village-Error!!

theYVC Inc (doh!!) VPSO training teaches that the goal is to make every HoldingCellGuest!!
-wait until they’re practically IndianFancyDancing, moving their feet MoonWalking so fast to Pee before letting them have an restroom break.

-laugh so hard at theVPSO’s silly jokes and then cry from being OC sprayed

-have an experience that will have them up late at night to early next morn’ “Drinking” to calm down from the memories of dealing with You theOfficer!!

-an Repeat Guest with Baton Stars hands on service, Victim’s Door to Cell-Door Limo service,

theMost talkative HoldingCell Guest is a
-Repeat Guest, often 2 arrests and charges in the same week for assaulting the same Girl!!, and they loudly state and resta…

Honey, I Drunk theKidz!!

In keeping with this Blogs silly tradition of quirkiness,
theVillageChixxx!! presents this next Installment of AlaskaVillageTales!!

namely Our cute chapely ones!! Oh.. we joke!!

Since we basically talked and cried, coaxed, cajoled and hugged our way into Exclusive VPSO office access we then,

looked the Other way while a few “Other” friends took over theInet and sorted through theArrestReports,

This is one dedicated man folks,
he eats, sleeps and breathes thisVPSO stuff,

has Journals that log each days events and contacts,
Even when he never spoke to anyone or had to break up any Parties,

he just logs what he sees, and later on Pieces theEvents together like a Puzzle and figures out who’s hanging with Whom,

whom is related to whom and basically how many of us are going to follow in theFootSteps of our Imbibing older relatives and whom will leave theVillage!! in a few years,

and thePictures he takes are incredible,
He shoots everything from everyday house interiors and foot prints, vehicles …

SOLO

SOLO

As an HeadStart attendee back in SouthDakota circa 1970/1971 I can attest to the facts that little kids really do love it when given theTreat!! that is known as an school fieldtrip.

I even remember theAirCraft/AC that we rode in, not details mind you, but it was an Moonie style, WingUnder.

Meaning that theWings were "Under" you thePassenger and that it seated about 4 to 6 of us at a time and if I remember theCockpit layout correctly.

It looked just like an Car!! And with my limited knowledge of AC, I do recall Moonie having an Line or two of AC of which theControls were just like an automobiles,

foot on theGas, foot on theBrake and move theSteeringWheel.

But I could be wrong and it was just an AC, typical of theTime that was SouthDakota.
Remember that most of theAC that we fly in today be it as Passengers, as Pilots, whether they be Civilian or Military use AirCraft.

Most of them are OLDER than you and me!!

My little group of kids sat around on the school bus waiting our turns a…