AlaskaVillageTales

TRIBAL ID CARDS My Tribe is the best Tribe in the world. Can't be beat when it comes to the Village Council vying with the US military or any other secret gov't agency in keeping up with the times in obtaining the latest in high tech stuff. My Tribal issued I.D. card has a holographic image of the Tribal Seal upon it; "9 little Smokehouses" all in a circle. Why 9? I dunno. Perhaps it's to avoid a stigma like the proverbial "10 little 'dinDins". And smack dab in the middle of the Smokehouse circle is a Shot glass. ??? What on earth for? As if to say that our lives now revolve around... Nevermind. And my neck occasionally smarts where the Bio-chip implant was recently inserted by the Village Health Aide. I'm told the implant is a smart chip. Good! I say. Because sometimes I'm not the smartestsestest...est villager in the vil.. Community. Although I don't like my PC rebooting at random and my toaster suddenly popping when I approach the kit...

YVC Inc wishes you a 2004 Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year 2005. All the outlying villages within Yukon Consortium boundaries always find time to quit bickering and will pause for a moment between sips 'o Gallo and JD to extend a warm Seasons Greetings for the Holidays. Remember!!! Don't drink and Mush!, or SnowMachine! or ice fish too. As demonstrated by an Elder in Highland last week. SAR (search n rescue) had to bait a hook with moose jerky to get a bite and reel him back to safety. All of the Upper YuViC Villages that just joined the Consortium this calendar year (Behemoth); Beaver Lake, Eastern Summit, Highland, Eagle Feather, Mt Black, Owl Creek, Trapper Lodge, & Hans Mill) are pleased as spiked punch to be in the YVC family. Just yesterday the YVC offices in Fairbanks had an unfortunate class "C" fire after the lighting of the Office Windows. Each window had various colored lights that, when collectively lit, would make a Building size mural. But one of...

There’s rain on the mountain, A white frost on the moors It’s an epoch of eternity, Waters touch the holy shore It’s a land of mystery, The world of unseen eyes You can feel the shadow of a princess, She waits for you inside The guardians of God play the pawns Beg for mercy - hail the queen Princess of the dawn In the war of the dragons, Young blood ran it’s course They fell to his blade,The knight iron horse A forgotten priest, Disappearing in the haze A chamber of vestal virgins,Twilight is her slave The wizard of oz, moved the pawns Life for satan - dust to dust Princess of the dawn On the day of the testament, The seventh moon was raging fire Heaven cried for the sacrifice, The midnight sun was rising higher The beauty and the beast, Lies in her royal crypt Her kiss is bitter sweet, Death upon her lips The holy grail held the pawns Kings and bishops bow to grace Princess of the dawn The guardians of God play the pawns Beg for mercy - hail the queen Princess of the dawn A new day da...

I was city, she was village. in fact, she led the rioting crowd and carried both pitchfork and fire. I was fat free, she was seal oil. her kisses of salmon berries and sugar, stored frigid as mother-in-law and a heap of salmon whipped in just to make things taste... fishy. I was McD's and she was a moose leg. Long, lean and sinewy and hard as road kill. Though in "town" she ate like she was in famine. "With Photo ID" read my credit cards. I was a CrownVic and she was the rider in back. in cuffs and spittle on her shirt, softly singing to herself and to her friend, me. I love you's on the machine, Come see me, her dad loved me too by taking my valve stem cores. I was her dozen roses and his 90 days! she was my Village princess in jeans and t-shirt, my spruce hen feathered hair clips held her reddish brown tiara upon her head. my t-shirt would bounce up and down when she got mad at me. In fact, all my shirts were pretty much mad at me. Full, swelling, anger. A...

Signatures I have had at the end of my e-mail messages. why God, why?! (the Minto VPSO years & Chistochina too) VPSO go alone and leave me away, I'm not as think as you drunk I am!! (the Minto Years) abandon all clothes ye who enter here (the massage therapist years in Seattle) thank you for calling sam's lil motel by-side-of-the-road. Prices to stay here are Felonies and Misdemeanors!! Don't forget to ask about our group rates (the Minto years when I got my office moved to the building with the Holding Cell, the Village Council and the TCC VPSO Director made me change my message d:o\ ) How dry I am! (the Minto YEARS) Your Village Called......they want You back! (ibid) Can they CAN THE MAN??, who knows. (the Minto years when local dissenters petitioned the village to fire the VPSO. The slogan was a spin-off on the State of Alaska's fight with Anti-snow machiners vs the Snow machiners. As the Anti's wanted to ban riding snow machines around Anchorage. So the Pro ...

Movies and Sitcoms from the Village!! Cold Case Files The night you confiscated the alcohol and wrote out a Tribal court report in long-hand then you were so tired you unknowingly left the report and the cases of Bud in the patrol car overnight in -40F weather. I'm with Her Friends to the end. Together since Kintergarten, two peas in a pod through High school and finally together in the patrol car on your way to jail. You'd high-five each other for punching the VPSO in the nose but your hands are cuffed behind you. She's Having a Baby (See 9 1/2 Weeks below) Gone in 60 Seconds What happens when the VPSO drives up to the house and suddenly it's Lemming migration out the back window into the woods. Two and a 1/2 Villagers Uncle Walt, his brother Douglas and lil' nephew Mikey-who was dumped off by his teen mama 6 yrs ago. One little shack, so much garbage and too much foot traffic day and night. A Few Good Villagers Questioning the VPSO to see whether or not he actuall...

Your Village Called!!! What is YVC?? (Yukon Villages Consortium) aka Your Village Called!!! by VPSO Samuel L Flyinghorse. YVC is the next biggest zany Alaska Email sitcom to wander across the muskeg since the tv show "Northern Exposure". YVC is an all star cast of Alaska Villages, demanding Elders, disgruntled Teens, lively Children and lost sled Dogs. Call the Alaska State Troopers, Quick! Wake the VPSO!! It's time for fun! Episode 1 Call of the Wild! It was a nice log cabin set on 3 acres of beautiful wooded land. The driveway was recently strewn and smoothed out with 1/2" pea gravel that crunched nicely under the tires of my pickup truck as I drove up. "Civilization out here in the woods". I exhulted to myself. But my blissful welcome to the village was interupted by the site of a small wooden structure standing in the back yard. It seemed almost reclusive in appearance standing there in the shade of the trees. Like a shy child that is too scared to talk...

Feb 2005. I woke up early today at 0600hrs. Not my usual waking moments lately. But today was a special day for me and for the Village. So I was up before the sun rose above the nearby mountains and was out the door by 1000hrs. Today my Alaska Native village hosted their annual Fun Day's event. There were 2 dog, 4 dog and 6 dog-team time sled runs, a game of chance called "Poker Run" and the Community Hall sold concessions and Native crafts and hosted kidz activities too. I like good positive activities such as this. It brings the people together and keeps the unique sport of Alaska sled-dog racing alive. And it lets Natives and non-Natives (whites) mingle and be friends. For up here in Alaska I've seen equality and friendship amongst whites and Natives on a much grander scale than what I have seen in my home Reservation down in the lower-48 states. I took lots of pictures of the sled-dog teams, their drivers, and various villagers & visitors. And speaking of vill...