Free Village Lessons!!

for free, yes Absolutely free Village lessons, just log onto AlaskaVillageTales and learn for yourself!!

theVillage!!
*singing*
"we ARE theVillage!! world, look at ourChildren.
they are theOnes who see theLight of day, while were passed out from Imbibing.

While theCouncil's shaken, VPSO's are saving lives!!"

oh.. Sorry Michael, Didn't mean to ruin your Song.

theVillage!!
for all yoo sphiisticateed llluushes Out thar!!
*Hic-cup!!*

theVillage!!
running to talk about Village-ism!!, but mostly running from theVPSO!!

theVillage!!
ourVPSO's flashlight's, among other things, make us throwUp!!
We'll start with his Reports and then move onto that crummy Violin practice!!

theVillage!!
back to SquareOne!!, that small 10'x10' HoldingCell.

theVillage!!
thousands of "Idle" wannabes turn up Statewide!!

theVillage!!
Always, low low LOW expectations!! (and standards, neckLines, waistLines)

theVillage!!
see Alaska deEvolve right before your very eyes!!

theVillage!!
Progressive drinking techniques.
trust your Lushness to hunnerts o' Yearz o' experence!!

theVillage!!
it takes all of us to Raise ourselves, Literally!!

theVillage!!
for best performance, select an State location that is free of VPSO's, VPO's or that is inaccessible to StateTroops even!!, and drink to your hearts content.

theVillage!!
villageMarriages don't cause erectileDysfunction!! in fact,
far from it, as ourVillageChixxx!! are theHottest,

but sadly, theVPSO's do cause ED if they hit you just right.

theVillage!!
*singing to theVPSO*

"because of you I've never strayed to far from theSidewalk,
Quite frankly, you've got us face down, kneeling on our heads and backs, how can we run?!"

"because of you I've learned to play on theSafeside so I don't get hurt,
meh.. at least not that much, unless our friends hurt us and then we turn around and accuse you!!"

"Because of you, I am afraid, and rightly so"
(sorry reba & kelly)

theVillage!!
learn from us whether you wanna be an Villager!! or just look like one!!

theVillage!!
enter our Village contest to see who'll open for Morgan later this month!!
Opening up her Cans & bottles that is, because just before she passes out, she loses functionality in her hands and arms-but not her Mouth!!

theVillage!!
villageMinders!! Passed out and trapped on theGround!!

theVillage!!
take our Temperature, please!! We're being liberal and praising our VPSO.

theVillage!!
if those Microbes can be revived after Thousands of Years, we can be revived after Thousands of Beers!!

theVillage!!
all our friends say, we started seeing double when theNewVPSO walked in!!
Apparently so upset were we.

theVillage!!
reallyBadHunnies!! as dirtyDancing, drinking and disOrder still going strong and will never be a thing of thePast!!

theVillage!!
Drive-a-Van Launch Import Attack upon Region's VPSO's.

theVillage!!
ourChicks!! are from heaven and theVPSO's need to go back to hell!!

theVillage!!
men & women of our Convictions!! 30days, 90days, 120days, 5yrs, 10yrs, 20yrs, Life!!

theVillage!!
theVPSO's "Hugs" program an enviable success!!

theVillage!!
4 lushOfficers killed in theLineOfduty as their Worlds, not to mention Egos collide in an empty VillageHouse,

As you may already know from previous BlogPosts, YVCInc (doh!!) was smitten by theInflux in those tiny cute Whimsical "Plushies" toyOfficers that, being theSize, Demeanor and cuddlieness of beanieBabies,

took over theDuties of Actual VPSO's!! for a short time in theVillage!! but their efforts were Stymied by their success as much as theNeed to be "Pill-free",

since Cotton (that pilled easy) and innards of Batting made them need weekly launderings.

But with success comes failures and some of those wellMeaning plushOfficers took to disposing of theAlcohol & Drugs into their own systems and some budding careers in theVillage!! collapsed,

and sadly, a few of these Officers learned theHard way that they aren't "FireProof", and so it is, with regret that the 4 new casualties in theWarOnVillage!! passed on,

cos someone had theAlcohol unbottled while another one was flicking theBicLighter and !!POOF!!

theVillage!!
we've had our Moments......

theVillage!!
oddly enough, it's NOT an different world out here!!

theVillage!!
expert guidance for you from theBasics to more AdvancedVillage-ness!!

theVillage!!
we're just here till someone else wants it!!

theVillage!!
same oldVillage inside, newVillage look Outside!!

theVillage!!
-----------------------------

But seriously.

today I didn't have to get up at 0200hrs just to start walking 6miles so I could be there at 0500hrs,

as opposed to just mere days ago when it rained and I got caught out there without an coat and got literally soaked,

but good thing I had extra clothes in my backpack, and I didn't have to drive that day either, I just sat around 4 hrs and dried out my clothes,

Driving theParaTransit passengers around is fulfilling and funny at times.

When you look at an Passenger Manifest and see old Remarks/Comments that are just outright hilarious (and they are when you think of it)

like, Mrs Adam's. her Remarks section reads like this,
"Limp to her walk"

No wonder she looked at me funny one day when I arrived to pick her up and since us ParaTransitDrivers have to get out of theVehicle ALWAYS and greet thePassengers,

follow them up into theBus and see that they are seat-belted in, often by assisting them in theProcess,

I limped over to where she stood,

"Are you ok?!" she stared at my leg,

"I'm fine Mr's Adams", I replied. And saw her into theVehicle, buckled her in and limped around theVehicle before getting in and driving away.

Because when driving around after an hour my legs, my knees get stiff and I do need to step out to stretch them.

But you could imagine theFun you could have with an Remarks/Comment like that one,
"Limp to her walk".

Another Remarks/Comment reads like this,
"Drop Henry off at HOME, never at theBar!!"

As just down theStreet and around theCorner is an old Tavern and Henry always jokes around that he wants to be dropped off there and he'll make his way home.

Technically, if an Passenger wants off close to home we can let them off, but in cases like Henry, He can't be allowed to drink anymore.

But there was an oldParaTransitDriver, an employee of theOldCompany that theNew company replaced,

and this oldPTD dropped off an Passenger 90mins before theBusiness he worked at was due to open,

and said passenger had an Seizure when he was all alone outside, he recovered and went about his day and never told theOldParaTransitCompany of this event.

But thePassenger told me one morning when I wouldn't let him off 60mins before his workplace was to open,

So thePassenger rode with me and we picked up two more People before we drove back to thePlace of Work and someone was there.

It's incidents like these, of bad customer service and better customer service at theStreetLevel, that makes or breaks an Company like ours, theOne ParaTransit service provider company that I now drive for.

As an general rule, us Drivers were told to NOT EVER leave an Passenger alone at their destination,

if at an group home, an HouseParent or other ResponsibleAdult has to answer theDoor or otherwise show themselves as we hand off thePassenger to them,

case in point: When I was still an TraineeDriver last month.
I helped an Blind man into his home and no houseParent was at theFront door.

I assumed that because theBlind man was "Home" and knew his way around theFront door area where he stood, that everything was fine,

but theBlindman walked forward, stepping down the "Down-going Stairs" and tripped over theShoes that were sitting upon theTopStep!!

He fell down theStairs in front of me, and I stood there in shock.
But my driverTrainer was behind me, behind us and he ran down theStairs to help pick up theBlindMan,

by then theHouseParent, an teenyTiny Asian woman ran downstaris where we were and was helping pick up theBlindMan,

Bad things happen when you "Assume". Keep that in mind.

And again, most recently, I took an BlindPassenger to an well marked, well known spot on theUniversityCampus of one facility here in anchorage,

and it was theWrong place!!

As I had been abruptly told and reTold by Dispatch to follow thePassengerManifest step-by-step, and don't change theOrder of Pickups or DropOffs EVER!!

ok.

So I followed directions and ended up taking my BlindPassenger to theWrong place on Campus, So we walked 100yds back, through an Main Bldg and back outside,

to the parked Bus and I drove my Passenger where theCampusLadies had told me where to take him. And I'm glad that I went into theBuilding with him too, even though our Service ends at theDoor, Always-whether an Business or an House we pickUp at or dropOff to.

So it was Dispatch's fault for that mistake, and mine too in a sense, as I represented theCompany.

But I try.
And still, small mixups, mishaps, injuries occur and they occur inspite of our best intentions to prevent them from happening.

I knew where theBlindPassenger was needing to go but he described an different building to me and so I too, listened to my Passenger,

But it's not his fault either. Once again, it's mine and theCompany's.

And last but not least.
"Don't talk to Mrs Jones....EVER!!"

Well, why?!

Because she'll want for you to lapDance her, and....

Other than these funny, sad, and eyeOpening experiences each day, I love driving theParaTransit people around.

And because of an incident that happened to me today as well, after driving a few hours and then catching theBus back to North Anchorage,

As I stood in company Uniform!!, skyBlue shirt, AnchorRides & other ParaTransit logos on my sleeves and breast pocket,

blueSlacks on and long Hair neatly Combed!!

I stood waiting for an connecting bus and an young man stepped up to me,
"Could you tell me where on LakeOtis parkway, by 72nd, which bus I catch!?"

I stared at him for an second then realized, that I've got on an Uniform vaguely similar to theRegular BusTransit drivers,

So I kindly told theYoungman that I wasn't theBusDriver he needed, that I drove instead, for theParaTransit company, theElderly & theHandicapped.

I knew this would happen, and it's why I carry my civilian clothes with me in my backPack and change out before and after my work shifts,

but, today I was too lazy to carry clothes, besides, I wasn't doing any other Visiting of prospective Employers and so I felt that I didn't need an change of clothes with me, WRONG!!

Good thing that I took some time to go to WalMart right after Work and buy theNice butCheapOnSale!! $1.00per yard mesh and cotton fabric,

So I can sew me another couple of WindBreaker/AnorakPullover Style "Hoodies" that are kind of sorta,

see through and provide some sort of Overgarment look and protection for this short but WARM sunny Alaskan summer,

today's temperatures were upper 70's F.

But winter will be here and by then I'll have an Rideschedule to work early in the morning or else I will be working SomewhereElse instead of Driving for MVTransport.

Take care of yourselves, Love what you do, Do what You Love,

teach others and/or reinforce in them your shared love for what you do,

remember that if an activity or an vocation doesn't readily and immediately benefit Others FIRST, then it might not be for you to do.

You shouldn't do things just for YOURSELF. That is selfish, that is unjust and it isn't right.

Thus endeth your free Village lessons for today!!

oh...

and I turn "24" (again!!) on Thursday, but my body turns 40.

I'll just do what my Salon friends suggested last decade when I turned 30.
Turn theNumbers around!! said the12yr old esthetician/NailTech extraordinaire!!

wow, I miss thoseSalonGirls and others I knew at that time. They could pack away an BirthdayPizza in no time flat!!

HappyBirthday to me and to anyone else on Thursday.

luvs,
theSam!!


slflyinghorse
theVillage!!, Alaska

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