from theVillageEnd!!

More Inebriations From theVillageEnd!! (bare Girl!! that is)
*Hic!!, Hiccup!!*

theCity!! Officers Report:
After theSam!! partook of his regular portioned fare of, in his words,

"Hot eehhy quizeen!!" of an plate of "Kay said Adios!! and a side of Gwawked Mole sauce, which, btw I had tooo much of sauce to dink!!"

theFromer officer meandered South instead of staggering East north by NorthEast,

He was later on discovered to be hiding in theCommunity Library still Hunt & Pecking his way through a very Tersely worded email to himself!!,

We, my partner and I,
Closed his browser window,

looked around briefly for the Smelly Czech boy that owned theLapTop, but he had long since, taken off scampering away,

We kept theLaptTop as evidence and after running theBabble!! through NCIC / APSIN and a ton of other Networks we subscribe to,

we discovered that, quite frankly, we didnt' have time for his shenanigans,

So another officer, an Female acquaintance of Sam!!'s btw, after placing him in Cuffs, leg shackles and an Hannibal Lector mask,

"Mostly to keep him from Singing to me and saying repeatedly "Hey Yoo!!" real lovingly,

Like I care!! oh..

Did I tell you guys that he sings to me!? ????,
I taped him once and my hubby got a big kick out of listening to that later on,

though I must say, We've been very successful in quelling recent Hostage StandOffs and Boarded Up-in-theirHouse-Suspects by playing theSam!!'s voice over theLoud speakers

anyway, my roots are starting to show again and quite frankly,

I hate how my Blue eyes look like raccoon eys after pulling twelves, I'll see if I can get him to open up and give me any more beauty tips"

She did take her... "friend" to his Apt in MtnView.

And my partner, Her Husband!!, and I stood around and wondered if her "Pulling 12's" had anything to do with her new Website and her Guys she recruits or else if she was talking of the shift hours....

*shakes head!!*
tenses and dry spurts!!

Case closed, and yeah, that reminds me.

To stop by theLilBrownJugged!! when I get off shift at Noon tomorrow.
Right after I drop my partner off by an Private Eye and his Attorney!!
End Report.

theVillageEnd!!

theVillageEnd!!
curvy curvy curvy!!

theVillageEnd!!
theMost Watched and sought after Bar & Grill in theRegion!!

theVillageEnd!!
our Books are often like our Patrons after an DVE / domestic violence event - in theRed!!

And our overall Image to everyone reveals a face with a Black eye!! eehhh.. Two of ‘em.

theVillageEnd!! bar & Girl
after our Cute Servers go home for theNight, some of them literally end up BEHIND bars!!

theVillageEnd!! barGirl
now available in Regular Foul Mood,
Bitchy!!

or just outright PissedOff!!

theVillageEnd!! BarGirls!!
also pouring Themselves into theChampagneGlass!!

theVillageEnd!! BarGirl
add Ice and Shake Vigorously!!

theVillageEnd!! Bar & Grille
our Nightcaps we pour for you are given with diamond studded or just plain chrome smiles!!

And check out theSpinners on those Pasties!!

theSam!! presents
theVillageEnd!!, Beer & Whine Menu.


Duchesse deBologna!!: $8
(for you Queens of bullshit - and we mean theFemale Braggers & big talkers!!)

Duke m’Out!!: $7
(for theMen of Royalty that really like to be Royal pains in theAsses to theVPSO!!, or to just about Everybody after drinking a few of these)

Delerium Tremens / DT’s: $Thousands!!
(actually theCost!! is free but you pretty much have to drink Everything else in mass quantities for YEARS before we serve you one of these actual drinks!!)

Hoble’on Chuffle sans Shirt!! / an IPA-S Trippel!! $18
(Translated as theHobble and shuffle w/o shirt!! / an Imported Prohibited Alcohol-Spirit in 3 servings!! as we say, Screw theDouble and go Beyond!!)

zeBlusshe Blousse Off!! $16
(served to females ONLY whom are of Legal Age!!, in Magnum buckets instead of those dinky Pony glasses, We like to get to thePoint here at YVCInc (doh!!) and quite frankly, So should YOU!!)

MarredSouse zuAre!! $13
(a perfect Introduction drink to buy that Broad sitting in theCorner, after a few of these Yourself, you’ll be slurring to theBarStool!!

Arree zzuuu.. yyooo marrreed?!???)

Goway baBoat!! $3
(like theHigh price of Gasoline, which is what this drink actually is!!,

You and your new Snag can steal away from theVillage!! in your Granma’s stolen boat and beach yourselfs upriver theRest of theSummer!!,

Cordially served with a shot of castrol gtx 40weight Chaser)

120WipeOut / in IPA bootlegger approved handy dandy backpack!! $20
theWinter version, After you get chased by theVPSO and WipeOut doing 120mph in a Spruce tree stand,

the$20 is for administrative fees in Arrest report writing.

80WipeOut / in IPA bootlegger approved handy dandy Carrharrtd work jacket!! $40

theSummer version, After you “think” that you get chased by theVPSO and WipeOut right in front of him at 80mph on theVillageRd,

the$40 actually covers the expenses incurred to restock his Medical Kit: SterileWash 4oz X 2, GauzePads 3packs of 20each, 2yds of adhesive ClearTape, RubberGloves X 4 pair, and 2 waterGel Burn packs after theExhaust pipe gave your arm and back the 3rd degree!!)

theBottleRocket!! $2
(served with an burning Sparkler to remind you of that one 4th of July episode when your friends thought it FUN to use your passedOut mouth as an holder for a Dud bottle rocket that didn’t fly!!

theDrink, like theThrill is our cheapest on theMenu.)

theAlaskan summerSostice Cervix deCreme (Now damnit!!) $THOUSANDS!!, for 18yrs

(one of our Bar “Tenders!!” inspired this drink one night after feeling her BiologicalClock ring and she grabbed theClosest Officer to her that cleared $45K a year,

If it wasn’t for that one Summer, that villageOfficer would have left theUniform a few years later and gone off to college and then Med school!!)

Hoen’zeGarden!! $10
(an VPSO in the predominantly “white” community of hansMill!!, located in theUpper YVCInc Region / uVic / and later changed to Your aVictim!! when more villages sprang up,

Was theInspiration for this drink. it’s actually made from Alaskan potatos, Beets, squash and tomatos!!

After theOfficer noted that a few Villagers were paying a Leettle tooo mmuuch attention to their back yard garden IN THE DEAD OF WINTER at 40 BelowZero!!,

theHigh cost for a mere 4oz is due to the fact that in theScuffle!! to Investigate and to arrest theBlitzed!! gardeners, the Hoe was broken and it cost about $10 to replace it,

*Hiccup!!*,

Cheers!!)

zeReal -aDe chzech!! Free!!
(this easternBloc inspired concoction was also inspired by an astute VillageOfficer just doing her job, once again-in theDead of Winter,

and some suspicious looking Villagers were, once again!!-working outside and Shirtless!! of all things,

theOfficer, she approached theWomen working and asked what theHell they were doing in her front Yard and they looked at her

and demanded that she “take a reality check!!”, so theSaid officer, she took a few czechs and an Estonian to jail that night,

so, if you just slow down, take a deep breath and gather yourself, we’ll pour you a sip of Reality On theHouse!!

but only if you promise NOT to pour it on that man over there quietly eating his Peach Crisp alaMode!!)

stoalin Carr!! $9
(like our “Go Away By Boat?!” drink up above, this drink is Gasoline too!!, but we also blend in hiEnd synthetic Oil, windshield wiper fluid which btw,

gives it that “blue tinge” and we’re theOnly bar around that serves this medley of motorMirth in an SideMirror precariously balanced upon an dented hubcap!!

just don’t ask us where the auto parts came from, WE gotta eat too!! & pay bills, feed theOnline game habits as well)

TwoGirls Pomegranate HardCider!! $10
(inspired by an actual DVE / domestic violins event when 2 sister VillageChixxx!! decided to have an difference of opinion,

One palmed theOther and ate a hard blow in return and then, they took the fight outSider!! into the bitter winter cold,

theVPSO used theSatellite phone to call theStateTroops and later on discovered that thePhone call bill for 45mins was at $10/minute!!)

Porter dar!! $6
(an short stout honey flavored Cute!! ale, festering with bitter after taste and stickiness in theCraw for months after your arrest,

because when theVPSO blocked theVillageRoad with his Pickup and made you empty your Cases of beer into his pickup bed,

he kept saying “Put her there!!” like, 24 times..... or was it like, OMG!! 30?!)

Steamed Pale Ale!! $8
(you’ll feel hot under the collar too as you are told by other Bar patrons nearby of how theVPSO!! and theVPO’s mistreat badly the Batches of beer that they confiscate

by pouring it out on the ground or else by using theBottled product and ALL of your Still equipment as shooting practice targets, those damn Rookie Cops!!)

SleepingLady douche Brut!! $25K to post bond and 5 to Life!!
(are you sure you want to drink this!?

We’d rather you NOT drink it with an female that You don’t trust, but hey pal, it’s your Life!!

This drink is served in a long neck bottle for adequate dispersion of product through Her.

Curvey rene!! $20
(yes she certainly is curvy, and expensive per Lap pour!!)

Alley Ale!! $10
(let this micro brew wander over your tongue, swhish it to and fro from left to right and then let it collapse in a heap in some dark corner of your numb mouth)

zeSamme!!
"zeHeifeWiesson....
ze heifferWise!!....

ze Huff Wifen!!
no no no... I say it wrong...."

"zu hiefe
no no... za Wife eez a weizen tuMe and no let me.....

*hiccup!!*

"noo lette mee zee drriinke indu house enymore!!

yep.. that’s vhat I wuz gong tooo sey.
Ohh.. end sshhheee..

Shhh!!! beee kwiiettee...
veddy veeddy quuiette!!!"

LOL,,

"end shhheeee sed.
zat shheeed ghett ze Smith... annt Wesson Oil...

no no no no....
sshhee ghetto ze Gun, eeff I ghetta dunked aggain!!"

*hiccup!!*

"Hey Yoo!!
hey occifer Clarrise!! !!!!!!"
-------------------------------

luvs, theSam!!

btw, Where Am I!?

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