a Dedicated and Medicated followUp!!

erhh.
and now Unemployed!!
d:oP
-----------------



------------------

theSam!!
staring at theGuitarChord Diagrams hour after hour and smiling,
cos theVerticalLines!!-which represent theGuitarStrings!!
and theHorizontalLines!!-which represent theFrets!!

all resemble theJailHoldingCell!! bars back in theVillage!!
and sam!! quietly pencils in prisoner hands and sad faces peeking out at him!!
d:oP

theSam!!
Building chord progressions while destroying Reputations!!, cos,
somewhere in WesternWashington!!,

an InternetGuitarInstructor!! is committing suicide after seeing theSam!!'s Latest musical installment.

LOL,
relax.

theSam!!
this is what happens when you're on existing Meds for injured shoulder muscles,
and you finish left over Vicadin and then, you buy not one, but 2!! cans of Bawls guarana cherry flavored energy drink!!

and stay awake for 2 days.

In anticipation for next Winters cold and flu season, theNativeMedicalCtr!! will be issuing sugarPills
(literally!! and aptly labeled "M&M"'s just like theOnes theSam!! buys at theHoliday convenience store)
to theBoiSam!!

sheeesh.

theSam!!
if theGovt can put lipstick on thePig!! and call it prosperous times,
Sam can pick up his musical instruments and call it Practice!!

theSam!!
holding his own in theHandCrafters Dept, when in a streak of creativity,
decided that his next batch of plushVPSO's!!

were to be made from CookieDoh!!, baked at 350' and served to theChippedCup!!
guests.

You might recall an earlier posting here in AK village tales regarding theMaking!!
of a few soft plush toys in theLikeness of an tiny officer complete with painted on accoutrements, or as in polite society they say "a Coo tray mawh!!"

erh..
What!? You don't recall an earlier blog posting!?, that's ok, neither do I!!

theSam!!
still having a good HairDay!! even after looking like he just RAN out of his OWN SALON!!

*screaming!!*
"aagghhhhh!!!, I cut my own hair......"

We here at YVCInc!! at least hope you tipped yourself after trimming up theDo!! before you went traipsing out again!!

theSam!!
not only reading theAlaskaDigest!!, but ya' know,
when after eating and drinking he IS an Alaskan digesting!!

theSam!!
most people don't know what to do after their respective "Career" dies.
Well, quite frankly, Neither does Sam!!

he just acts like he does!!
And when thePublicSafetyOffice!! career went CompletelyKaput!!
theBoi!! just went home.

In fact, even when he's working day to day in theRestaurants,
He's STILL home!!,

erhh. due to theFact!! that he still wears an Apron!!
I mean...

no sense in cutting theStrings!! when you can make your own DishWasher!! apron and instead,

fend off complaints from Internet strangers and even his OWN Violin Instructor
that, indeed, Yes!!

theSam!! should cut theInstrument strings!!
d:oP

*what theHell!?*

theSam!!
now Giving a 2 for 1 Special on Hugs to his fave ServerGirls!!

wow,
Musta been in a hurry one night at work and put theGlasses!! back ON after putting theSofLenses IN!!

roseColoredGlasses!! might hide theTruth,
but with Doubled vision, theSam!! saw twice theBeauty!! d:oD

theSam!!
not only letting theFur!! fly, but letting theFly!!......
mehhh, never mind,

private joke there that no one will understand.

theSam!!
not only FaceDown in theGutta!! (well, at least he writes like he's been there!!)
but also flat on his Ass!!

eh, But I did already mention my falling OFF theLandlords porch didn't I?!
anyway, moving on...

theSam!!

theAfflicted!!
Storms wallop theSouth!!, theMidwest lashed by rain and snow!!
and Alaska pained by theBloggist!! once again.

theHeadLine!!
Bippled by Crumb, theCandied it (inebriate/transient!!) eyes Bar seat!!

But that's what ya' get for eating fluffy Apple turnOvers just before ShiftMeal!! is announced and you scurry out to theBar!! hoping to get a seat by theHotChefBoss!!,

if only because, she may sit at theAppointedPlace!! day after day, but from theSam!!'s point of View,

that's theBest place in theHouse to be, or right next to it,
to get a great look at theJimBeam!!, theJoseCurvo!!, theSpicedRum!!, theTequila and those cute lil' rockStar miniCans, aka theGroupies!!

ehh!! *guffaw*
cleavage smeavage.
I dream of Skyy & smirnoff!!

theCartoon!!
Stealing art maybe a dead-end calling, but has anyone ever checked out an villagePublicSafety career-gone-kompletelyKaput!! up in Alaska!?

I don't think so....

From making Drug busts to just hugging them!!
Uhm.. theBusts!! that is.

And on occasion peaking over softShoulders as "they" read thePapers
and admiring theWorks of Art!!

or often, theSurgeons handiwork.
d:oP

theSam!!
per Local controversy, theBest way to hide things, might be to put them in books,
but theBest way to hide things from theSam!! is to put things out in Plain site!!

now adays, these SofLenses are so discreet and comfortable,
I'd swear that if I didn't have a bottle of LensLube and an empty lensCase in my pockets, I'd go to sleep with 'em in my eyes!!

theSam!!
once considered applying for Flea Bottom-ist!! in theClassified ads section of thePaper, but then remembered that,

having just come from theVillage!!
all those darn SledDogs and their supply of Fleas were endless enuf!!

no thanks, I'll pass on that opportunity, as I already have an 2.5yr Degree from theVillage!! via thePublicSafety course.

theSam!!
not only selling stuff after placing an classified ad!!, but buying things too!!

like, homes, cars, vacation property,
albeit, all theOwners are out of country on "vacation" and want a wireMoney transfer!!

Just kidding!!, kidding.
d:oP

theSam!!
whom not only HAD an easy bake MethOven when he was a kid,
but he still has one NOW as an adult!!

albeit, he has to share it with 4 LineCooks, 18ServerGirls!!, 7BusBois & 10BusGirls!!, 3UpperMgmt + 5 RegionalSups that visit now...Alot in fact, and spend too much time in Sam!!'s kitchen!!

>:o(

theSaladStation!!
some people love theBalsamic dressing sooooo much,
they'll eat Anything you pour it on!!

Best trash day we had in a week, cos, we got rid of our thick cardboard boxes in an hour when theHealthNut crowd-fresh from their Gym visit!! made their weekly appearance for their Rice cakes, cinamon tofu and just to smell theBreathmints!!

And yes, we put theFunny mirrors inside theLobby JUST for them.
(the kind of mirrors that make you L-O-O-K skinny)

We all were so Not in theWeeds that day at work,

(weeds, is an expression in Sales and marketing, or WAS, that you were knee deep in weeds when you were having slow day, bad day etc. It's just an expression)

theJanitor!!
feeling "bubbly" and chipper again now that a new shipment of RinseGard & Sanitizer is now safely nestled in theBroomCloset!!

in fact,
it took theDayManagers along with the 4 biggest Line cooks (and they all weigh more than Sam!! easy by 150lbs plus!!, and theSam!! btw, is a svelte 250lbs!! d:oP)

and just 1 ServerGirl!! (one of the Smallest ones) to extricate theDummo!! from theCloset last Friday night.

As they pulled his feet he was chugging at the Wash-n-Suds and opening up theWindex!!

Later on everyone was happily, merrily staggering down 3rd Ave,
theMIDDLE of 3rd ave enroute to theNearest Bar!!

*hiccup!!*

theSam!!
considered by many Whom are In theKnow!!, to NOT be a Spring trend!!

d:o(

In fact, theOnly thing that should be "a Hit!!" this spring, is your Boot to theSam!!'s ass when he comes round.

theSam!!
as Flaky as theAppleturnOvers he eats,
as bland as theSouffle' he makes,
as tart as theKosherDills he slices,
as cool as theWhip he tops theCheesecake!! with (and sometimes, theCuteNose!! of a cute ServerGirl!!)

as crumby as theCoffeeStand!! cookies he sneaks into theKitchen each day,
as shaky as theTable legs of table #17, which btw, had Nothing to do with a girl aged 17 and..... *ahem*..

as Out of Tune as theLobbyPiano,
as well worn as theLeadServerGirl!!, her of 2 kids from various Patrons!!
as Stiff as theDailySoup and just as lasting!!

theSam!!
no longer Medicated,

just caffeinated up and slowly winding down to a crawl.

-------------

Comments

Anonymous said…
Sam, sombody gave me this computer and it dont have sound card, what??????? So, I need to purchase one hopefull this weekend. And try to put it in myself - it cant be that hard can it? seem a lot going on at the chipcup or chip dishes, I dont know - I cant remember what I read and one of those that goes back to refresh my memory but tonight - I am lazy.
lbj
Anonymous said…
Sam, I mention before that I had no sound card - but I did install one and its working. I listen and try to count but number 2 is nice and sound good and second to last one is okay to. Thanks

lbj

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