He's Not Heavy, It's His Blog!!

Actually, She's Not Heavy-She's a VillageChick!!
d:oO !! (panic)

theSam!!
his Blog posts reached 250, much like his current svelte sexy weight!!

theSam!!
too Sexy for theVillage!!, too sexy for his Cuffs and quite frankly.
Just Too Damn Sexy for meaningful Employment!!
d:o/

theSam!!
celebrating yet again with more deprecating humor,
chagrin at his expense,

for you to grin and Wince!!
d:oD

theSam!!
too sexy for SpelChekc!!

theSam!!
but not too Sexy for thePFD this year......
or unemployment and another go at FoodStamps!!

theSam!!
and at 4 in the morning, with a JOB to report to at Noon.
apparently not too Sexy to sleep either!!
--------------

theSam!!
start Living!!,

and while you’re at it. Start Working!! Or at least looking for another job.

theSam!!
Living, Laughing, Lubbin’!!

well, at least he WAS.

now he’s Leaving, Livid and still Limping from falling on theIce over 2 weeks ago!!

theSam!!
Just one Look!!

and then another stare in disbelief at theBoys!! predicament in theVillage!!
and then followed by a sigh of Relief that THAT wasn’t you.........Today!!

theSam!!
Recently named theVillage!!’s “Most Fired” officer.

theSam!!
from true Native hero
to just plain Gyro!!

....erhh. With a side of Fries and Coke!! And extra Cucumber dressing please!!

theSam!!
from SafetyIntern to complete CareerU-Turn!!

theSam!!
from Clear career path to destructive crash scene!!

theSam!!
from Both hands on theWheel to falling Asleep at theWheel!!

theSam!!
not even a Hospital CrashCart could jumpstart his Career,
but maybe a few cookies from theCafeteria would make him happy!!

theSam!!
from PublicSafetyCareerist to Bloggist!!

theSam!!
from Peerless DoubleCuff-Click to a Bar order Double!!

and a stupid dollar bill trick to anyone that’ll listen.

theSam!!
from Smith&Wesson DoubleCuff-Click to Internet JobSearch DoubleMouse Click!!

theSam!!
from extraordinary to Mehhh!!!.....

theSam!!
from straight up Officer to a Vodka straight!!

theSam!!
from VillageOpportunity!! to FoodStamp Eligibility!! d:oD

theSam!!
from VPSO Office to an application form in theHR office!!

theSam!!
from Brown Attired!! to just plain tired... d:o(

theSam!!
from thePerfectFit to “yourHonor, he would like to move to Acquit!!”

theSam!!
from filling theCityJailCells!! to filling in theDatabase spreadsheet employment document cells!!

theSam!!
from One Shining Moment to not being able to turn his VPSO career light-BackOn!!

theSam!!
from Good LEO company!! to company, after company, after company, after company,......

theSam!!
from Report HeadLines to theFoodBank breadLine!!

theSam!!
from This moment on!! to ............. Who!?

theSam!!
from Brown Attire to Satire!!

theSam!!
from PatrolVehicle Firestone’s to WalMart shoe sale specials, color: Stone.

theSam!!
from Driver’sSeat!! to walking feet!! d:o)

theSam!!
from DutyCoverAll CamelToe!! to extra blisters on feet and toes!!

....man those $100 vpso brown coveralls I bought were short bodied!!

Ever put pants on a frog!? or a Native!? they got no ass!!

theSam!!
from “Be Quiet!!” to “cut the jibber jabber and keep scrubbing those pans!!”

theSam!!
from 10yr Plan!! to yesterdays DishPan hands..... d:o/

theSam!!
from S L F to A J B!!
(my initials to Alaska Job Bank / Center’s Initials!!)

theSam!!
from ironed Uniform!! to starched Apron!!

theSam!!
from Giving Tickets!! to getting MealTickets!! d:o)

theSam!!
from TCC to YVC!!
(my non-Profit employer initials to my Blog site Name Initials!!)

theSam!!
from Service Courteously!! to jobSeach Desparately!! d:oO !!

theSam!!
from a Smile to a Jaded frown!!

theSam!!
from region Reknown!! to onlineClown!! =:OD

theSam!!
from Breast Pocket!! to Shirt sleeve Pocket!!

(as us LEO’s carried our pens in front breast pocket to us FoodService!! carrying Pens, Markers, food Temperature guages in our left arm sleeve pocket)

theSam!!
from Hot SafetyCareer!! to kitchen HotPlate!!

theSam!!
from warm VPSO coffeeMug!! to 240x160pixelMug!! (for Bistro Mgr’s HR records)

theSam!!
from Warm & Friendly!! to Serving Dishes that are Hot & Trendy!!

LOL.......
from Warm & Friendly!! to Nomi & Wendy!!
(two of my favorite meanest ServerGirls!!)

theSam!!
from Incumbent!! to unemployment!! d:o)

theSam!!
from Victory!! to EBT!! (the electronic debit FoodStamp card)

theSam!!
from Village leisure!! to Pizza-Villa!!

(not that I’ve ever worked there, I just eat a Slice & a couple of cheeseCakes too!!)

theSam!!
from “over theHood... and spread ‘em!!” to MtnView hoodlum!!

theSam!!
from “put your Hands Out!!” to thrusting his Resume and applications Out!!

theSam!!
from Ambler to Gambell!! to 4th & Gambell!!
(from being Woo’d by 4 nonProfits at one time and employed by One, to theJob service on... 4th and Gam..)

theSam!!
from a Village!! view to Fairview.....

theSam!!
from a scenic Mountain view!! to shots fired!! Mtn View!!

theSam!!
from Patrol car & holdingCell keys!! to a crumby Apt & Restaurant locker keys...... d:oD

theSam!!
from “PullOver!! to “Sir,,, yes, You with theFood box outside theRestaurant at 2a.m., yes, you. Uhh. Step on over to theCar here....”

theSam!!
from Unakleet!! to 3rd Street!!
(eehhh... I’m just saying!!)

theSam!!
from a PatrolCar!! to midtown CARRS!!
(cos Fairview’s LOCKS UP their mouthwash now damnit!!)

theSam!!
from employing theStinger!! to drinking one!!
(or else, to applying for work at theStinger!!-thePanhandlerBar on 4th. Not that I ever went there, but I see it every day, Calling to me, beckoning me.

oh... and theStateTroops call that Tire Deflation device-theSpikeStrip!!, “theStinger“)
---------------------

luvs,
theSam!!

samuellflyinghorse
anchorage, ak

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