theSam!!'s Room

theSam!!'s Room
heralded, lauded and complained about, as theMostMessiest!! place in theHood!!

No wonder MtnView's having "springCleanUp".
Just hoping that theSam!! will lug his tv,

his vcr's, his miniFridge & Freezr and his mini-MicroBake EZBurn methOvenz!! over to theCollectionPoint by theThriftStore!!

ha,
as if.
----

theSam!!'s MessyRoom
"please Clean me, let Lease go!!"

what!?
----

theSam!!
coming Clean about onceEvery week!!

This weeks specialGuests at theLaundry!! were travelingDancers!! from SoCow!!
omg!!

After Drying & Folding trou!!
theSam!! scampered on over to McDee's for 2 largeMilkshakes!!

( . )Y( j ) <---- she was Pierced!!

seriously,
oneGirl was so petite,
herTrampStamp was bigger than her!!

and her Implants doubled as ottoman's when she needed to sleep - for her AND her friends

-heaven- d:o)

and Dazzle, Sparks, Micah and Belle!!
----

theSam!!

another day in theArms of Paradise!!

and Dazzle, Sparks, Micah and Belle!!
----

theSam!!'s Room
giving "Hazard" it's due,

one heap of foldedUp clothes at a time!!
At least theFoodWrappers, Containers are in a box - courtesy of theRoaches!!
They said I was giving "them" badHeebees living here.

sheeeesh.
----

theSam!!'s Room
if anyone's out there....."please!!, Please for theLove of God..."

"send a Doubletime CottonLounge & Pillows!!,
Jute Drapes and a crushedIce glazed Curved sideTable!!"

"wait... scratch that, his SluttyFriends will provide 'pillows',
and theJute is a viable substitute for cigarettes,

and theGlazed look of theGlassTable will at least LOOK like drinks,
pop and otherSTUFF has been spilt,

while being totally clean!!",
d:oP
----

theSam!!
His route to "Napa" valley vineyards no doubt,
took him instead to "Napa" parts store,

where upon theONLY!! time in his life,
he'd ever worn a stupid Ballcap
was when he drove parts around theCity!!,

and it was theCompany!! car that had theBallCap on!!
d:o( -annoyed-
----

theSam!!
unlike thePolice song - Everything he does is Tragic!!
-oh NO!!- d:oO
----

theSam!!'s MessyRoom
take it OUTside mister!!,

but theGirls!! can stay.
----

theSam!!
Knows his way around theVillage!! eyes closed, 100deg. fever, sniffles and
under theNyquil & HotCider in theDead ofWinter!!

has a weakness for all things CheeseCake!!
to include even Cheese AND cake (but the cake better be frosted!!, and you better have stood in a long Line for hours for that Commodity cheese!!),

loves watching theVillageSun!! set on theVillage!! from his LodgeBalcony
while staying inside for a change!!

theSam!!, villageGuest!! since 1999!!
----

theSam!!'s Villagerz
theCupCakes & Souffle's of life when theSam!! doesn't really LIKE cupCakes & tasteless Souffle's!!

-tongueOut- d:oP
----

theSam!!'s MessyRoom
quit blogging about yourself and vacuam theFloor!!

if ya' wanna be Amazing, you'll line the4 wall bases again with Roach spray and pick up your clothes!!

at least you don't have dirty laundry strewn about.
-exhausted- d:o\
----

theSam!!
when theVillageChixxx!! look younger and Younger, so does HE!!

wait...

ewwe!!
-tasteless- dXoP
----

theVillageChixxx!!
Reverses theSigns of VPSO StressInduced-aging as they protect themselves with NG-2 Jail-ioPlex!!

a combination of threats, warnings and other LAW & Order / authority defying shield protectants!!

"No.. I'm NOT Going!!,

get your hands off me you pervert!!,
that's MY bottle-don't dumpit....

aahhhhh!!, somebody help me!!"

In fact, they're villageClinic!!-ally shown to reduce VPSO / ageSpots and those
silly "Cop"per lines in theSand is as little as 4 weeks!!

No wonder that "VillageChixxx!!" is recommended by most village-Get-Rid-of-theVPSO-ologists!!
--happy-- d:oD
----

theSam!!
right now at theSam!!'s room,

Glued to theScreen!!
various foodSmears, handPrints, dooHickey's and lipPrints
(probably from kissing theDishes!! when yahooAds show theMenu-of-theWeek!!)

And theStoriesContinue!!
blog post after blog post after ForumPost after Email!!

no wonder his LakotaNose is so big!!

LowPerformance - HighMaintainance!!
basically theSam!!'s day to day work ethic, while seeking out theReallyPretty!! girls to say hi too
-swoon!!- d:oP
----

Are You Hungry forParis!?
Are You Hungry forFrance!?

Are you hungry for food from
bars and restaurants!?

Get theInsiders view on AlaskaVillageTales!!

a Savvy, Detail-packed, (evenIcePacked when a frustratedServerGirl!! slugs him)
insiders guide to theBest eateries in theCity!!

Some folks call him theToque from Tok!!,
but actually his home Village!! is just 100miles south!!

and no... theBarChefs!! no longer let him wear those sillyPaperHats!!,

instead, theSam!! wears those hospitalWhiteHairNets!!

See what readers have to say!!:
"Everytime he snaps a foto of what he's eating at McDee's that week and sends it to me via CellPhone,

I get nauseous inside and reply - that's nice....but I prefer HomeCooked!!,
and stop it, it's 3 in theMorning, go backOnline for christSakes!!,

erh..
next time, send something from RoundTable!!"
-an Hot Alaska Chick!!
----

"a ho hum dinger and a bottle of Rum!!

or at least that's what he always sends me viaCellPhone picture each week after staggering home from Downtown via theEastSide and a taxi out to theAirport!!

he sends me theSame old tired photo of a pack of SpongeCake dingers and a bottle of Capn Morganz Spiced!! that he bought at thePackageStore next to KOOTs!!

funny thing is, it closed down last year!!

I'm too busy to tell him that simple little fact....
maybe he hid stuff around theCity,

uh..

You're not gonna print this are you!?"
-anTaxiDriver / hotUniformClad alaskanLEO chick!!

theSam!!'s silly blog is available ONLINE!! at AlaskaVillageTales!!
----

theSam!!
upFirst!!

toBedLast!!

and still awake most hours in between!!
except when he's napping.
d:oZ
----

theSam!!
as Beautiful as YOU are!!
even though his closeCut taper will reGrow!! back out in 2 weeks!!
d:oP -silly-

----

luvs,
theSam!!

samuel l flyinghorse
anchorage, alaska

AlaskaVillageTales!!

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